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Dani Lucas completed her family through adoption and is a skilled trauma informed specialist. Dani shares with us her insights into finding and arranging therapy for children and in supporting others with complex trauma history, family violence and more.
The topic of wellbeing in the caregiving space (kinship, permanent, foster or adoptive parenting) is important. Dr Stacy Blythe offers us advice, from research, that identifies how we might better impact attachment, minimise behavioural issues and improve outcomes when there has been prenatal exposure to harmful drugs, poor oral hygiene or other impacts on executive functioning.
Dr Stacy Blythe is well qualified to advise us on these topics. She is a a parent of 8, with 4 biological and 4 non-biological children, and also a registered nurse, associate professor in the school of nursing and midwifery and deputy director of the translational research and social innovation group at Ingham Institute (health and wellbeing that make sense practically).
Leanne Winter is a clinical psychologist who specialises in animal and equine therapy and working with childhood behavioural, sensory and other issues. After 14 years in room based clinics Leanne ventured into animal and equine therapy in her paddock! Animal therapy offers a calmness to therapy: stroking and being with an animal reduces stress and the heart rate. Combine that with being in nature and magic happens!
While its not as simple as just walking around a paddock, often that is how it starts and something comes up in the conversation. Perhaps the children see one pony being bossy and they say that's just like this guy at school. Or perhaps its just the experience of doing things they may not do elsewhere, like jumping in puddles. Children learn about attachment and regulation and self awareness in a meaningful way.
Layne Beachley is one of the most successful surfers, male or female, in history with 7 world titles and 29 tour victories. Layne is also one of the most genuinely unapologetically honest people around with an experience of a traumatic childhood in losing her mother at 6 and finding out she was adopted at 8.
Zahra is PCA Families Client Services officer, is Australian born but of African heritage, and is passionate about outcomes for culturally and linguistically diverse communities, completing her studies in cross-cultural counselling this year.
They can also face prejudice within more than one cultural group. Zahra shares with us some of the norms, traditions or ideas that are part of the African culture, that may be relevant to consider in cross-cultural families to help with identity and cultural connection.
Zahra highlights some of the practices in the African culture may include:
Helen Barrett is a registered play therapist, clinical social worker, counsellor and certified filial therapist with a trauma history of her own.
Helen explains how play therapy works and offers some real life examples where trauma and abandonment result in eating disorders and the constant need for reassurance.
She explains the importance of the relationship where the therapist coregulates with the child to metabolise the trauma and widen the window of tolerance. An example of a child who has autism shows us the importance of mirroring and testing things in the playroom training ground before taking that to the everyday environment, ultimately reducing the intensity of meltdowns and transition times.
The importance of being congruent is discussed. If you are feeling anxious or angry, but pretending not to be, your child will see that and feel that something is not right, creating even more threat for the child, exacerbating even bigger emotions.
Helen wants parents to be more conscious of their own narrative and how that impacts the parent-child relationship.
Bobbi understands the demands of caring for those with additional needs from a trauma background as a devoted kinship carer to her 13yo grandson, and she suggests:
This week we learnt from Chrissie Davies, an adoptive and permanent carer, who has worked as a teacher and consultant (Calm the Chaos) to families impacted by extreme behaviours and trauma.
Chrissie explains the importance of kids from trauma in finding identity and self worth which comes from intrinsic motivation, nature, creativity, connecting and therapeutic parenting without punishment or rewards (PACE). It also comes from removing complacency and being flexible.
Chrissie highlights how our nervous systems get replicated in our children, which means role modelling appropriate responses and consciously labelling emotions and actions are important, to raise children's consciousness. Choosing optimal learning times is important too.
Chrissie explains the 3 components to emotional literacy, including naming the emotion (do some mirror work), the physical response (such as red cheeks) and knowing what to do with the emotion (such as getting something to eat).
Be the family that talks about emotions and where it triggers your own trauma just sit with your child and breathe.
Bobbi Cook is a behaviour therapist with 30+ years experience and a very devoted kinship carer to her 13yo grandson.
Bobbi teaches us a few things that she learnt the hard way as a kinship carer! They include:
Anna Beeson and Elise Saunders are Therapeutic Life Story Work (TLSW) practitioners who have worked with permanent and kinship carers and adoptive parents in completing life story work.
They highlight the value of the work which comes from being curious and wondering together, a shared journey between caregivers and the child, uncovering more than one person's perspective and capturing the child's voice, their narrative once they make meaning of their history.
In TLSW children are offered support to dig deeper into their past with safety and support.
Chrissie Davies, an adoptive and permanent carer, teacher and consultant (Calm the Chaos) to families impacted by extreme behaviours and trauma wants you to understand children's brains so that you can be confident in the decisions that you're making.
Chrissie suggests that when you truly focus on relationships, trust and connection for your children, rather than control and punishment, they will respond more positively and you can save your time and energy for the big things, like sleeping, eating or speaking kindly and the lifelong skills that our children need.
Chrissie suggests you say yes more and start each day anew!
Dr Eliana Gil has been on a quest to integrate trauma informed practices with neuroscience and has studied attachment based therapies like the Circle of Security and Theraplay. Working with Dr Bruce Perry, with a background in expressive therapies, Dr Gil is an advocate for various expressive therapies including Theraplay (along with many of her peers from Dan Hughes and Besel Van Der Kolk to Daniel Siegal and Stephen Porges).
She reminds us that those who love us hurt us, and this is why children need time and safety to move on from past trauma.
Dr Gil kindly shares with us real life examples of how traumatic experiences come up in the play, including examples of physical and sexual abuse, divorce, natural disasters, grief and domestic violence.
She reminds us that unwanted behaviours are not rejection, but questions that need to be depersonalised, and that children take a long time to heal but that it doesnt have to be permanent.
Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing has moved on from being "that tapping therapy" and is now one of the Medicare funded therapies that works so well with children from trauma backgrounds. Find out more about it from Maria Marshall - psychologist, naturopath and EMDR therapist and parent to 3 children, including one through permanent care. Some great tips on how to approach therapy and EMDR when the body "keeps the score".
Chris has experience working in many fields, from specialist teaching in schools to homelessness, family violence and the justice system. Believing that she could be more useful, she set out to truly understand the brain and body, studying numerous therapies.
After all of her learning, it is the safe and sound protocol, a listening or auditory system that helps with calming and felt safety, that is Chris's favourite thing, with the potential to achieve felt safety following a 5 hour core component combined with therapy support.
Chris has seen mute children start to talk, disregulated children reengage and children who are adopted or had a traumatic birth and start to life, start to repair their birth process. And she does all this with a sense of fun involving play, art and clay therapy too.
Enjoy the video and please comment to let us know what you thought.
There is often an element of a child's unknown history and underlying trauma.This can impact on relationships and development. Carers/parents may be doing all they can but nothing works because the children's brains haven't yet been primed for development. This may be because the brain is stuck in fight flight freeze or because milestones have been missed. Yvette Knights offers neuro development therapy, a physical therapy, that helps with rewiring the brain and meeting missed milestones. The science behind it is based on polyvagal theory.
This therapy can help with emotional regulation (manage and understand emotions), speech and language, motor development, organisational skills and problem solving skills, learning and balance. So for those with ADHD, Autism and similar this therapy helps too.Yvette discusses many specific examples of where she has made a difference in a child's life including food intolerances, anger and tantrums, coordination and bike riding, reading speech and language, self harm and more.
Anna is a Filippino adoptee who traced her biological mother and was able to reunite with her and other relatives. In the process, Anna navigates adoption loss on many levels:
Eating disorders and self harm were tools Anna used to help suppress the curiosity and internal conflict. Anna has great insight as she has done the work of deep reflection, is a qualified counsellor and psychosocial recovery coach and is fully immersed in the adoption community.
PCA Families spoke with Gregory Nicolau, psychologist and founder of the Australian Childhood Trauma Group about therapeutic parenting.
Gregory showed us how therapeutic parenting and change in the brain takes time, consistent and ongoing connection, and a village to support carers and parents.
He suggests we look to the Dadirri model used in the Aboriginal community, not control and consequences.
He highlights the importance of understanding developmental needs in the therapeutic parenting model, so that you can help your child with their stressors and access the right supports (therapists, psychologists or psychiatrists)
Practical strategies to use with quarrelling siblings are given that can be implemented with ease.
Definitely worth a listen!
Tory is an African refugee who came to Australia at 5 years old. At 7years old she found herself in long term care, with one of her sisters, where she stayed for 11 years. Tory had to adjust. She went from youngest sibling to oldest sibling in the carers home. She went from an African culture to a blended Australian / Germanic refugee cutlure in the carers home. Therapy and cultural immersion were not Torys "thing". Nor was having 10 animals around! Having a strong open relationship with her carer and accepting that she was in a safe place with people who loved and cared for her was her "thing". Eventually Tory moves out of care two days before her 18th birthday, with a gentle push from her carers, into independent living with Youth Foyers. Tory reflects on the supports offered to her, that she sometimes rejected and wishes she didn't, and the importance of having a strong open relationship with her carer.
David and Michael are a same sex couple who formed their family after a long term respite foster care relationship developed into a permanent care placement. Their two children, two brothers, were 2 and 3.5 years old when they would come for respite care from Friday night to Sunday night every second weekend. Those two children are now young adults. We have a wealth of information to learn from David and Michael about gratitude, how a strong emotional connection can lead to great things and how to navigate care in the LBGQTI and broader community with keeping expectations high.
NDIS & Mental Health Engagement officer with Merri Health and Carer Gateway, Nicholas Colicchia, fills us in on what happens when carers seek respite care support from Merri Health, one of the 7 Carer Gateway partners.
Nic clarifies that support is available, regardless of other income entitlements like Centrelink or carer allowances. He tells us what to expect, and how to get registered and how to work in with NDIS if they are also involved in your young persons life.
There are great supports available. Everything from support for household tasks like meals, laundry or cleaning, to recreational and capacity building programs or even holidays and cultural events.
